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This week's post is from Ted Shimer of Freedom Fight. Ted contacted me about 10 months ago, after reading Beyond Betrayal, because as someone who designs groups for male addicts, he wanted to make sure he was understanding the wife's side of the story. I really appreciate it when those who work with the men take the time to learn about betrayal trauma and consider how they can support the partner.

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As a wife, I understand this can make you feel angry, hurt, betrayed, or discouraged among a range of other possible intense emotions. The point of this article is to help you think about solutions that can actually help foster healing rather than just throwing the book at him, and telling him what a jerk he is maybe rightfully so. Here are four possibilities to consider if you have a husband watching porn:.

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Here's how to inoculate ourselves against negative ones. Verified by Psychology Today. Sexual Intelligence.

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We have some ground rules, of course: no interacting directly with anyone on or offline, nothing violent, and if it messes with our sex life, we need to re-evaluate pronto. But other than that, my husband watches porn and jerks off pretty frequently — almost daily. I consider myself someone who has a pretty normal sex drive.

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As the title of this blog suggests, the most commonly raised problem with porn usually comes from wives who think their husbands are watching too much, are too interested, etc. This difference of opinion not to mention the porn itself can cause trouble. If you think your husband is watching too much porn, and raise the issue or tell him to stophe likely resists - and the result is not only dysfunction in your sex life, but also an argument over how that dysfunction can be addressed and resolved.

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Leman talks about the severe consequences of porn addiction in a marriage and how they affect not only the spouse, but the kids too. Kevin Leman. Produced by Unmutable.

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The other day I was texting with my friend Max. Max is a fake name, which I'm using because what Max and I were texting about was porn. And yeah, that's why I'm anonymous here too.

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Many people contact Fight the New Drug to share their personal stories about how porn has affected their life or the life of a loved one. We consider these personal accounts very valuable because, while the science and research is powerful within its own right, personal accounts from real people seem to really hit home about the damage that pornography does to real lives. Recently, we received a disheartening story, sent to us by a thirty-something woman. Her story is one of rejection and loneliness in her marriage, and it embodies the all-too-familiar feeling of being in second place to porn.

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My husband and I had been married only a few years when he came home from work one day to say he had been suspended for online pornography. I was then pregnant with our second child. It felt like an atomic bomb had fallen on me: All that I thought was safe and stable in my life imploded, and everything around me went into slow motion.

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There's no question that it can be upsetting to find out that your husband or male partner is watching pornography on a regular basis. It's not uncommon for men to do this, as men are programmed to be aroused by visual stimuli, and he may have started watching porn in his teen years. Most likely, it is not something to be alarmed about, even if you're married or in a committed relationship. In some cases, however, excessive porn watching can threaten a relationship.

Comments

  • Otto 24 days ago

    Any uncencored Japanese porn is hot to me, wish all of them could stop fooling around an do the same for all of them. Im sure they have there reasons but I just never understood why when we clearly know whats going on. Almost like a joke or something

  • Lochlan 3 days ago

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  • Joel 11 days ago

    AMAZING! Thank You!